Ugh. Haven't slept in hours

Edit: That title would make a whole lot more sense as "Ugh. Haven't been able to get to sleep all night", which is what I meant to say but failed to because I was half asleep when I started writing this yesterday (incidentally, I'm having trouble sleeping tonight, too, in case the late hour didn't tip you off). Hopefully you all got the picture.

There's so totally wi-fi across the road from where we've broken into, but it keeps dropping in and out so I don't know how much I'll get done before James wakes up and pulls me away from my 'Heretical pursuits'. Travelling's really been messing with my head lately and I haven't heard from Ben in forever, so forgive me if this entire thing is massively disjointed and train-of-thought in style. Not that I'm panicking. The guy's doing a tour of Europe - I don't exactly expect an email everyday.

The last one I did get was worrying in the extreme, though, so maybe I'm not panicking and just worried. Apparently, while driving through Germany he got massively creeped out by the Black Forest and a whole bunch of foggy mountains and bare trees in Italy and Switzerland. They're the only bad parts of the trip he's mentioned so far, and I don't think anybody'll miss the obvious implication. For anybody living under a rock, I've heard tell that the Boss's head office is in Germany so if there's anywhere He could show up without prior warning or cause then it's definitely there. I'm not going to panic and do anything stupid because there's absolutely nothing I can do so far away and whilst being watched 24/7, but I want it on record that I'm not enjoying the situation I'm in at the moment. I guess I just have to wait, even if it's killing me.

On another note, I think Hosozukuri (you might know her as the (Minstrel), if you're into the 'Core Theory') is getting worse, which is a damn shame because I've always loved her music. Depression's a symptom just like the lost time and atypical behaviour (3341, in this case) and it's all piling up faster than I'd like. That and the fact some colleague of mine is hanging around doesn't bode well. Not that I've met the colleague - since Hosozukuri probably isn't even Australian. There's no way to tell if she's experiencing any other symptoms, though, because you never know what a person's leaving out of their blog. It's not looking good at any rate. Like I said, I love her work and it's a damn shame.

Um, that's all I wanted to write about, I think, apart from a headache that I hope to God is the result of far too little sleep for a week and not an upcoming 'performance review'. Oh yeah - on that note, the overwhelming urge to write that made me start the blog has gone. It disappeared a little after the Solstice, in fact. I'm not going to up and leave or anything so don't panic, I just didn't think to mention it until now because it's not all that important. I figure it's something you all deserve to know anyway, though. Full disclosure and all that.

Apart from that, I promise I'm writing up everything I've done while away from the Internet, I swear. It's just a whole lot of rather boring stuff interrupted occasionally by an interesting anecdote or two, so it's taking a bit to get through and cut down to something that's still interesting.

Well shi- shoot. I was going to say shoot

I see you've all met James. 


If I could make a request, can we please not talk about the 'content' of his post and comments? I'm sure you understand why I don't want what he wrote about discussed where prying eyes can find it. But I can say that when he says "do Not listen tO The bliNd foOl, andreW. To defy his light is to Bring UtTer ruin down upon you. Safety can Only be fOund in eterNal service." I believe him, and will be doing what he has told me to do and when he has told me to do it. 


I don't have a clue how he managed what he did, but at least it puts a new light on one or two conversations we've had recently. Lately, when we've been going over whatever plans we have for my colleagues and I, he's been telling me not to do anything rash or foolish if I 'happened to be alive after the solstice' and he also said that I was not to 'act' until it became obvious 'now' was the perfect time, and I think we can all see what he was referring to. He stressed the word 'perfect' several times and dropped 'obvious' in almost as much, so while you all probably want me to do what he's talked about right the hell now, I will be waiting until the perfect moment shows itself, and does so in such an obvious matter that I will be unable to ignore it. And besides, James has been doing this job for a very long time, so I'm not sure how long 'soon' is supposed to be.


And if one of you mentions something that subsequently closes whatever gap James seems to think is coming up, I will find you and kill you and I am not even joking. And then if I'm lucky, He will reward me for destroying a Heretic, nothing will change and I'll keep on going with my job. So please, play it safe and don't mention anything. On that note, I've changed my password and had a little chat with James. He's acting particularly dogmatic and denies having any memory of posting on my blog. He's on record as saying he wouldn't have any part in something so blasphemous as a blog about Him, so I'm 99% certain all of James' actual mind is back hanging from the place I can't mention without bleeding out my nose and I'm just talking to the Taken he's become again. 


Which is a problem, because he won't leave me alone. He's quite literally sitting right next to me as I write this, muttering mutinously about heretical behaviour and foolish Servants. When I tried to talk to him about privacy, leaving me alone and what-not, all he did was rant at me about our duty and 'His work'. Best I can tell, we've apparently been given a task when the boss dropped him back here, and that task seems to involve watching me constantly and planning a trip around the country to visit everybody in my phonebook. If I'm going to guess, whatever opportunity I'm supposed to take will probably show up during it, since it's going to involve a lot of travelling.


Anyway, it's about dinnertime and James is starting to get angry, so I guess this is it for now, or at least until we've eaten. And if anyone's interested, nothing happened to me in my hotel room at all. Quite literally, the most interesting thing that did happened was my head ached and my nose bled a little bit on Monday night right around when James says He came visiting down the street at the Internet cafe, so I guess my internal migraine-and-blood-based warning system is still functioning. Yippee.


Also also (It's a vocal habit I have, ignore me.)


Writing stories? That was your grand plan? Sorry to sound so fatalistic, but I'm fairly certain if that's all you guys can come up with then we're all in a lot more trouble than I thought we were. Seriously, I was expecting some huge move against the Touched or something, or a massive fi 


Damn it. Migraine's back like you wouldn't believe. I guess can't talk about that, either. Although I guess it's not really a surprise. Burn? I can say burn. Burning things - things that most definitely don't involve my boss and are most definitely not (paraphrasing myself here) 'unable to move every few nights to stay safe' might've helped a bit. There's a reason He uses fire sometimes - being that it is the most destructive force He could possibly imagine. But then again, maybe He just doesn't enjoy it when you do that, rather than is actually weakened by it. Like I said, I'm not one for theories.


Anyway, I really do have to go, James is about to start preaching to the entire cafe about my heresy if I don't stop now, and I'm not even joking. I'll probably be back after dinner, but then again, I'll have to convince James to come so maybe not.

See you all on the other side...

... I hope. So checked in today and immediately decided I hated my hotel room. Good new is I've found a 24 hour Internet cafe around the corner(ish). I've been stalling going back to the hotel since because the TV channels are lacklustre, there's no Internet there and the whole thing feels claustrophobic, but if I want to be back by twelve I need to leave soon. I'll be out of contact and protected by the hotel's security for the next two or so days, and the only people I plan on seeing will be delivering room service. I'm not even going to bother checking on my colleagues, since an order to stay in their rooms unless He says otherwise is more than enough to fulfil the responsibilities of my job, and frankly I'm not in the mood to manage crazies right now, all things considered.

I don't expect any funny business because you need a key-card to make the lifts work, but if there's one thing I've learnt in this job it's that there's no such thing as too paranoid, so I'll be sleeping with the knife under my pillow as always. I really hope I don't see any of you in the next few days, and I'm practically certain whatever you're planning isn't going to work, but good luck, nonetheless.

I'll probably post a report on the twenty third, if anything noteworthy happens and I'm still alive. If nothing goes down, then I guess I'll just comment here so anyone who cares will know I'm still alive. See you all then, or not. I guess we'll see.

Questions, Answers and the Solstice

M asking about trees gave me an idea, so I thought I'd set up a nice little blog post for anybody to ask me questions they have about my job or my boss. It's basically midday right now and I'll be hanging around here for most of the day, I figure, so feel free to fire away if you're reading. I'll post a comment saying when/if I have to leave my Internet connection, so until then, I'll at least be checking the blog every few minutes. I'll probably be on tomorrow, too - since I know for a fact this weekend is going to be uneventful, barring an unforeseen emergency.

And another thing - three days, twenty one hours and fifty seven minutes to the Solstice (did I get that right? I'm still not sure I made the time conversions correctly when I set the countdown clock on my laptop), and I have the hotel rooms booked. Yes, that's right, my colleagues and I are going to ground for the Solstice. On my insistence, might I add. That's is, of course, if I'm lucky and He doesn't show up between then and now to Walk us all somewhere for the big showdown you all seem to think is going to happen. I'm not the kind of Servant you ever see bothering Heretics anyway, so I'm actually quietly confident that even if He does come to take my colleagues somewhere, He won't need me. Or at least, that's what I've been hoping and praying for. I'll be honest in saying I have absolutely no idea what's going to go down on the Solstice or if anything will be going down at all, being that I'm not the kind of person who's all that well informed in my little organisation.

If I were Him, and everybody on the Internet was talking about how they were investing all their hopes in fighting back on a particular date, then I'd probably do the smart thing and just not bother anybody on that particular day. Actually now that I think about it, has anybody considered the possibility that the Solstice will come and go, and all that will happen is you'll spend all day looking out for Him and His 'children' while we all hide? It's what I'm planning to do, and I've heard absolutely nothing about special plans from anybody.

Then again, I do live in Australia, where we'll be having the Summer Solstice, rather than the Winter one, so maybe the opportunity for whatever it is you all think you're going to do only exists in countries that lie above the equator. Personally I have no idea how or why the Solstice was picked as the date to fight back. Maybe there's something I'm missing, being relatively recent to Internet discussions concerning Him, but it never made much sense to me.

So I guess, in the spirit of this post being one for questions, I'd like to ask, why did you guys pick the Solstice to fight back, and what are you planning to do? And yes, I know I work for the enemy, so if you don't want to tell me what you're doing, that's fine. But why the Solstice?