Thursday, December 23, 2010

Well shi- shoot. I was going to say shoot

I see you've all met James. 


If I could make a request, can we please not talk about the 'content' of his post and comments? I'm sure you understand why I don't want what he wrote about discussed where prying eyes can find it. But I can say that when he says "do Not listen tO The bliNd foOl, andreW. To defy his light is to Bring UtTer ruin down upon you. Safety can Only be fOund in eterNal service." I believe him, and will be doing what he has told me to do and when he has told me to do it. 


I don't have a clue how he managed what he did, but at least it puts a new light on one or two conversations we've had recently. Lately, when we've been going over whatever plans we have for my colleagues and I, he's been telling me not to do anything rash or foolish if I 'happened to be alive after the solstice' and he also said that I was not to 'act' until it became obvious 'now' was the perfect time, and I think we can all see what he was referring to. He stressed the word 'perfect' several times and dropped 'obvious' in almost as much, so while you all probably want me to do what he's talked about right the hell now, I will be waiting until the perfect moment shows itself, and does so in such an obvious matter that I will be unable to ignore it. And besides, James has been doing this job for a very long time, so I'm not sure how long 'soon' is supposed to be.


And if one of you mentions something that subsequently closes whatever gap James seems to think is coming up, I will find you and kill you and I am not even joking. And then if I'm lucky, He will reward me for destroying a Heretic, nothing will change and I'll keep on going with my job. So please, play it safe and don't mention anything. On that note, I've changed my password and had a little chat with James. He's acting particularly dogmatic and denies having any memory of posting on my blog. He's on record as saying he wouldn't have any part in something so blasphemous as a blog about Him, so I'm 99% certain all of James' actual mind is back hanging from the place I can't mention without bleeding out my nose and I'm just talking to the Taken he's become again. 


Which is a problem, because he won't leave me alone. He's quite literally sitting right next to me as I write this, muttering mutinously about heretical behaviour and foolish Servants. When I tried to talk to him about privacy, leaving me alone and what-not, all he did was rant at me about our duty and 'His work'. Best I can tell, we've apparently been given a task when the boss dropped him back here, and that task seems to involve watching me constantly and planning a trip around the country to visit everybody in my phonebook. If I'm going to guess, whatever opportunity I'm supposed to take will probably show up during it, since it's going to involve a lot of travelling.


Anyway, it's about dinnertime and James is starting to get angry, so I guess this is it for now, or at least until we've eaten. And if anyone's interested, nothing happened to me in my hotel room at all. Quite literally, the most interesting thing that did happened was my head ached and my nose bled a little bit on Monday night right around when James says He came visiting down the street at the Internet cafe, so I guess my internal migraine-and-blood-based warning system is still functioning. Yippee.


Also also (It's a vocal habit I have, ignore me.)


Writing stories? That was your grand plan? Sorry to sound so fatalistic, but I'm fairly certain if that's all you guys can come up with then we're all in a lot more trouble than I thought we were. Seriously, I was expecting some huge move against the Touched or something, or a massive fi 


Damn it. Migraine's back like you wouldn't believe. I guess can't talk about that, either. Although I guess it's not really a surprise. Burn? I can say burn. Burning things - things that most definitely don't involve my boss and are most definitely not (paraphrasing myself here) 'unable to move every few nights to stay safe' might've helped a bit. There's a reason He uses fire sometimes - being that it is the most destructive force He could possibly imagine. But then again, maybe He just doesn't enjoy it when you do that, rather than is actually weakened by it. Like I said, I'm not one for theories.


Anyway, I really do have to go, James is about to start preaching to the entire cafe about my heresy if I don't stop now, and I'm not even joking. I'll probably be back after dinner, but then again, I'll have to convince James to come so maybe not.

12 comments:

  1. How old is James? It's funny but I know a James too who is not all there, not saying it means anything just funny. Also have you seen Him since Zero and then tried to play create your own stories with Him? People are saying He's dead but I saw Him this morning and am wondering who else has too.

    - M

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  2. I haven't seen Him, no. But James got back after the solstice from wherever He took him somehow, and I'm willing to bet it was the boss's favourite method of transportation that did it. That and the fact all my colleagues are still, well, my colleagues is enough proof for me.

    And James is somewhere in his twenties or early thirties, I think. He's not exactly one for skin care (or showers) and he looks hella worn out all the time, so I don't really know. I'd ask him, but he's seen your name (letter?) on your comment and refuses to say anything other than "Tell him he'll burn for his crimes". Guy is seriously not a fan of you, M.

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  3. Just stories? Are you sure? Rather disappointing, to say the least.

    Any ideas why James would suddenly be told to follow you around? The whole nosebleed/migraine thing you have prevents you from saying anything He doesn't want you to, so it can't be the blog. You wouldn't happen to have any fuzzy patches in your memory concerning your stay at the hotel?

    Regardless, I'm glad to see that you're okay and not crazy.

    Good luck on your travels, and stay safe. Oh, and tell James the Heretic/Onlooker infested Internet says 'hi'.

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  4. I don't believe I've had any memory loss, but my stay at the hotel was pretty much me doing the exact same few things all day on my laptop while I watched TV, which all tends to be remembered indistinctly at best. I haven't had anything to suggest I'm experiencing memory loss occur to me yet, so I think I'm safe for now.

    As for James, I'm fairly certain his increase in vigilance and fervour are a result of the boss's visit (the increased vigilance is almost certainly the result of a direct order), and I don't like to question His motives because more often then not they're completely incomprehensible.

    And as for saying hi, James says several unkind things not meant for polite conversation, some of which are anatomically impossible. He also suggested you should take a trip to a less pleasant part of the afterlife and help fuel a combustion reaction.

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  5. Thank heavens for that, then. Here's hoping those orders don't turn to anything too unpleasant later on.

    I'm very glad to see that he likes us! And such a heartwarming reaction.

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  6. Yeah I'm real popular with the code set. I walk down the street and they chase after me in what I can only guess is fit of fan fueled love.

    - M

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  7. @Mar, I guess you could call it heart-warming, being that your heart would be warm for a time. :P

    And @M, you're a man after my own heart. Sarcasm always makes me weak at the knees. ;)

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  8. Haha glad you liked it.... wait what?

    - M

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  9. It's the fan fuelled love you were talking about, obviously.

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  11. Or your 'deviant hobbies' James was talking about. Haha

    - M

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  12. Don't get me started on deviant hobbies, M. I'll scare you all away.

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