Saturday, January 29, 2011

Just a thought

You do all know that by making plans, and joining groups, and identifying as people defined by how they relate to Him that you're making Him stronger, right? The worst part of this is the 'resurgence' (I use the word lightly, since the few instances I've seen hardly constitute a resurgence) of titles I've seen lately. I dunno, maybe it is a resurgence - it's starting small, but these sorts of things always do.

It's not like you even need the brackets to have a title, or we'd all be sweet since there's probably only about three people that still use them. In His world the symbol is the thing, but that doesn't stop the thing from also being the thing. The brackets make it the symbol, dress it up and make it easy to spot, turn it into something to cling to while your sanity slips away and you become His, but you still have a title when you give yourself a name and a corresponding role and let it define you and how you interact with everybody else. M said it best when he said that Taken are just shells filled with His Will following what few patterns are left from their old life, and a title is simply another pattern.

And let me let you all in on a secret - the more patterns you have, the easier it is for you to slip. Anything that you do 'just because' or out of habit or in an attempt to maintain an image is the kind of place He slips into, because you'll keep doing it without questioning it even if it's stopped helping you and started helping Him. The worst part is you don't even notice at first - it just kind of happens without your say. Dressing yourself up as something more than just a person being followed by a very poor impression of a person and all of His friends tends to backfire when He take a liking to your clothes.

If you want my advice, don't give yourself a job unless the very definition of it is 'keeping away from Him and staying alive'. Anything else has too much wiggle room, which is to say it has wiggle room in the first place. If your job is to collect information about Him, well, eventually He's going to convince you that there's more to collect on His side of the game. Hell, that's not even hard to do since it's the truth. If your job is to take risks so that you can protect and help teach and equip others with what you learn, then you've obviously never heard the term 'slippery slope'. You're either doing everything you can to keep sane and survive, or you're slowly but surely committing suicide of one form or another.

That's not to say you shouldn't wonder about how He works or not try to draw conclusions from what you've experienced. Not doing so would be stupid. Deliberately provoking Him to learn more just happens to be stupider. I've seen the aftermath one too many times. I used to look after them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't have to understand Him to survive. You do have to be mad to understand Him. Which would you prefer?

Also the first person to mention myself as an exception gets a slap upside the head, because you're clearly missing the entire point of my little tantrum here. I'm the first to recommend begging for your life when He has you cornered, but not getting cornered works a whole lot better, especially if you've been aggravating Him from the moment you met Him just so you can understand Him better. Begging tends not to help by that point.

I never got you guys. Seriously.

8 comments:

  1. I think most of us don't get you either. But we wuv you, though. *hugs* I'm glad about you being well. Also: Harmony is a tool. (doucwhutididthar?)

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  2. I understand what you're saying here. I don't think I've really seen anyone coming up with titles, though, what with Robert getting mind-wiped (how does that work, anyway?) and the Core Theory falling out of favor.

    It's splendid to see you're alright and getting closer to your brother. Have you contacted him yet, email or otherwise?

    Stay safe and sane, Andrew. I hope you find an adequate ritual for yourself.

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  3. We have the groups as a support thing for us, alongside creating some kind of coherency among our findings so we could avoid re-doing things by accident. And after Jeff recently, it seems that it was the right idea to keep everyone tight.

    As for those of us using titles, I can't speak for the others, but I'm doing it to test out what you've just said as a Theory. (And the title I've chosen is an amusing in-joke XD)

    As for those of us deliberately taunting and collecting data. Again, I can't speak for all of us (and I know in this case, the only one I can speak for other than myself would be my Mother) is because we're already dead and can't be bothered with this whole...Running palava. Like I've said, we don't really have the stamina for that.

    Eeeh. I know he'll kill me. I'm perfectly aware of that. I know he'll probably kill my Mother before me, just to make me suffer and he'll probably do things that are Worse Than Death before all of that too, but I have a terrible apathy towards my own mortality and little to no propensity to begging.

    FF XD Of course it was stupid. I can't say I don't regret it, but I can't change the past, only look towards my vastly shortened future. And I know what I want to do with it.

    And I have to thank you for the laugh at the clothing analogy, the mindimage of Slendy in...well...a t-shirt with a heart on it and the jeans I'm currently wearing is either the stuff of nightmares or sitcoms. XD

    "We're all mad here."

    I wish you luck with your brother (and living in general,)

    ~Avalesca
    The Scientist

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  4. See, I still don't get you people. >.>

    Each to his (or her) own, I guess. I admire your - whatever you want to call it - ideals, principles, daring? But I have to say I'm a fan of living forever or dying in the process. I don't know, it just always sounded nice to me.

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  5. Hmm. I suppose that's where we differ...even when I was little I wanted to join the Army like my Father, because I've always preferred the idea of dying for someone(s)I wish to protect.

    DERP.

    ~Avalesca
    The Scientist

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  6. Well, I can kind of empathise with that, seeing as I got myself stuck in this mess for much the same reason, but I'm still not one to go poking the bear, so to speak.

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  7. Heh...funny you should mention that. "Keeping away from him and staying alive" is pretty much the exact job I've given myself.

    Also, I'm a bit concerned about the new background/picture you've got. It says "your move," but in the tic-tac-toe scenario you've got set out, whoever moves next can set up an unlosable scenario. I personally wouldn't want to be in that position.

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  8. Well, don't go reading into it too much. I was mostly bored and trying to think of something that didn't have The Operator Symbol in it, per se.

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